Loving Lola- Ch. 46

Secrets and Lies.

“Hey, you alright in here?” Giselle is sitting on the toilet with pieces of tissue in her hands. “I’ve been trying so hard not to break us up since mom died, and all I’ve managed to do was push us further and further away from each other.” “That’s not true,” Jhené says walking into the bathroom, “I’m still here, and you can’t push me away even if you wanted to.” “You know what I mean,” Giselle says blowing her nose, “I’ve made a lot of stupid mistakes in the past, but I finally started to feel like we were getting back to where we used to be.” Lola goes to look for them. “Listen, all that stuff that happened with Sam, Lola, and the company was probably going to happen even if you hadn’t-” “hadn’t what?” Lola says walking into the bathroom. Giselle hops from the toilet, “even if you hadn’t what?” “Oh, no Lola I was just saying that-” Jhené tries to explain. Lola’s looks at Giselle, “G? What is she talking about?” Giselle stands there in silence, with tears rushing down her face, “Lola, please,” Jhené says pleading with her, “No Jhené, I want her to tell me what she did, I need to hear her say it…” she says as her eyes begin to water. Giselle’s eyes grow wide as she looks at Lola, “did, did you know?” “I always thought it was dad who convinced one of his devout chairman to run him away to try and keep me there, but it wasn’t, was it?” “Lola…” Giselle reaches out for her, “why?” Lola says backing away from her, “Lola please let me explain,” “then explain, why would you do that to me? You of all people knew I was unhappy there, but Sam… he made being stuck there bearable for me and you knew that… so why would you send him away from me?” “Lola, I- I didn’t have a choice,” Giselle says to her crying, “our father saw Sam as a threat to the company. He saw how close you were getting and the conversations you’d have about leaving the company… he was infuriated,” “so what? He sent you of all people to get rid of him?” Lola says with tears in her eyes, “…yes.” “How could you?” “I didn’t want to do it Lola I swear!” “But you did, didn’t you?” “Please,” “So what did he offer you in return? More money? A higher position?” Lola’s eyes widen, “he made you president, didn’t he?” “Lola PLEASE!” “Ugh, wow, so much for family huh… And you know, the fucked up part is that I’m not even mad about Sam, I mean yeah I was hurt when he left, but the fact that it was my family who’d stop at nothing to rip away any piece of happiness we had because of fabricated feelings they had toward an artist! Yes, I did talk to Sam about leaving and pursuing a career in art, but all I thought was how I could never leave you guys or break the pact we made… but after everything happened, I realized dad didn’t care about what made us happy, he only cared about that damn company, and that’s when I realized I could no longer stay there. I hoped that you guys would find solace outside of that place and we all could be free of him, but I guess that was naïve of me huh. Lola, “always the dreamer”, isn’t that what dad would say? Somethings never change, even though people do… You guys can just let yourselves out.” She walks out their way so they can leave, Giselle wipes her nose and the tears from her eyes, “Jhené?” Lola calls out to her, “…how long have you known?” Jhené turns and looks at her, “I just found out.” Lola turns around and wipes the tears from her eyes, “but that doesn’t make me any less guilty, so if you’re going to hate her, then hate us both.” Jhené gathers their things and walks with Giselle out of the room. Once they reach the front door Giselle calls out to Lola, “I am so, so sorry, but please don’t hate Jhené, she had nothing to do with this,” Lola walks to her bedroom door, “I would never hate either of you… please lock the bottom lock on your way out,” she says closing her bedroom door.

Loving Lola- Ch 34

Telling the truth.

Jhené looks at Giselle confused, “What do you mean you lied?” Giselle covers her face in shame, “Lola was under the impression that Sam just up and left without a word because that is what I told her. Before she quit the company, she held onto the hope that he was coming back. She would ask everyday if he had called the office, looking for some sort of sign that he was going to return.” “Okay, but what does that have to do with you?” Jhené asks her. Giselle walks into her room and goes into her closet. She pulls out a box hidden on the top shelf and walks over to Jhené. She takes the box and sits on the bed, opening it. She pulls out numerous envelopes addressed to Lola; some never opened. “Giselle, what are these?” “I didn’t think Lola really cared for him until it was too late.” “Giselle,” Jhené says flipping through envelope after envelope. “She looked so hopeful every time she’d ask about him, then she’d look hurt when I told her I hadn’t heard from him. I couldn’t tell her what I had done.” “Giselle, what did you do?” “He called, and called, and called, and called, until one day he just stopped. I thought he had finally moved on and let her go, but that’s when I received his first letter. He figured that we were never going to let him speak to her, so he got smart and tried a different approach.” “Giselle…” “I was too deep in at that point to just say “I’m sorry”. I had to rid her of him for good. I knew that there was no going back so I collected all the letters and hid them so that there would be no remnants of Sam, and she will never have to know what I did.” “How long did you expect to keep this from her?” Giselle walks next to Jhené and sits down beside her, “ha, longer than this.” “Why didn’t you just throw these away? Why keep them?” “…I don’t know… I guess a little piece of me wanted her to know the truth, but I was always scared to tell her, so I hoped that holding onto these letters would one day give me the courage to give them to her and air it all out. But every time I thought about doing it, there was always some asshole she was dating that ended up breaking her heart. How fucked up would it had been if I, her sister, told her that I got rid of the one man who truly loved her, forcing her to encounter these terrible men? I could never do that to her, so,” “so you decided to not say anything at all and let her believe that Sam wasn’t shit either…” “hmph, do you hate me now?” Jhené is quiet for a moment. “I could never hate you, but I am disappointed. Lola trusts us, we are all we have, we can’t afford to do things like this to each other. G, you have to fix this before it’s too late. Now that Sam is back, I’m sure that he is not trying to lose her a second time. He could easily tell her all of this, don’t you think it’s better to hear it from you first than from him?” “How do we know he is even trying to pursue her though?” Jhené looks at her stale faced and pulls a letter from the box and begins to read: “Hold on tight and don’t let go, I will take you anywhere you know. All you need is to take my hand, and we will leave our footprints in the sand. In your eyes, there is that gleam, that I now only see inside my dreams. If only you knew that what I feel, is a feeling you’ve imprinted on my heart that’s real. Together is where I want to live, so you can receive all the love I’d give. But until then, I will love from afar, because leaving you has left me broke down and scarred. So, in hope of the day you’ll feel it to, I’ll forever hold onto the thought of you. – Sam.” “Now, does that sound like a man who is willing to give up so easily? He will try again, and I don’t think you will be able to stop him.”

Jhené places the letters back into the boxed and puts the lid back on. “Based on the content of these letters, he doesn’t seem like a bad guy and that’s great considering the scum from her past. She deserves to be happy.” She gives Giselle a hug, tells her good night and leaves her room closing the door behind her. Giselle takes the box and places it back inside the closet on the top shelf. Maybe I can talk to him instead… if I am to fix this, it needs to start with him. She cuts off the light and leaves the closet.

Loving Lola- Ch. 33

Digging into the past.

Dinner for the rest of the evening was full of laughter and fun filled conversation; they refused to let the earlier events spoil their night. Since Jhené picked the restaurant, she agreed dinner was on her, and although both Lola and Giselle enjoyed their experience at a new place, she promised to never bring them to any more of her favorite spots again. After leaving Depasco, Giselle dropped Lola off home, and they bid their goodnights. Shortly after exiting the car, the atmosphere amongst the two sisters began to shift. There was an unnerving silence between them that could not be helped until it was broken.

“So, are you going to say what’s on your mind, or are we just going to sit here and act like nothing is wrong?” Giselle asks Jhené. “What are you doing Giselle? Why can’t you just leave well enough alone?” Giselle lets out a sigh, “you don’t understand. You were much younger back then, so responsibility for the company was not a concern for you yet. If he would have stuck around Lola would have,” “left the company?” Jhené interrupts. “News flash G, she left anyway. So, what are you hoping to accomplish this time? Do you want to completely push her away, because that’s all you’ll be doing.” “I only did what I did to protect her. That’s all I have ever done, protect her, hell protect you both. Father blamed him for her leaving like that, and honestly, it was his fault. If he had not shown up spewing his artsy nonsense, she would have still been at the company where she belongs.” “Are you sure dad was the only one who wanted him gone, because I definitely sense some resentment on your end toward him. And if I remember correctly, wasn’t it you who interfered with their relationship?” Giselle scoffs, “what relationship? Lola did not pay that boy any mind; she was so consumed in the “art world”, that she continuously overlooked him. Please, I did that boy a favor.” “You don’t know how she felt about him, I may not have been “concerned” with my position at the company yet, but I did pay very close attention to you guys. I distinctly remember how both you and father reacted whenever she’d bring him up. Lola was too afraid to say anything about Sam because she knew that yall didn’t approve of him. Have you ever considered that maybe she opted to leave the company because of how Sam just disappeared? What if she defied father because she knew he had a hand in his dismissal? What would you do if she found out that you also played a part in that as well? Would you tell her that you were just trying to protect her? Because it sounds like you and dad were both being selfish and decided to cut any happiness away from her that did not have any ties to the company to only secure her position there. But yall failed to see that snatching away her happiness so abruptly, did the one thing yall believed was going to happen if you had let him stay. Giselle, I love you, but if you do this, I’m afraid you’re going to lose her for good.”

Giselle and Jhené arrive at their home. After their discussion, it was clear Giselle had a lot on her mind. Once they are inside, Jhené drops her things and gives Giselle a hug. “Listen, whatever happened in the past, is history. We appreciate how you’ve always looked after us, but we’re all adults now, if this Sam guy is bad news, then she will see it. Our Lola has been through enough bullshit to know what she will and will not settle for. Please do not make her choose between us and her happiness, because I know for a fact, we will lose that fight.” Giselle looks away, “I hoped that with him out of the picture for good, all the bad things I did would have been buried forever, but seeing him again, after all this time, brought it all back up. I got scared and angry…” she sighs, “What if he tells her what I did? She will never forgive me.” Jhené grabs her hand and leans her head on her shoulder, “then you apologize. That’s all you can do. Yes she will be hurt, but eventually she will forgive you, that’s just how Lola is.” Giselle lets go of Jhené, “Yeah, I’m not so sure. I lied about what happened between her and Sam…”